heart pondering
“But Mary treasured up all these things pondering them in her heart.”
I love this verse! Mary has, in the space of 2 chapters in Luke, been visited by an angel bearing the good news that she was going to have a baby, without a husband. She has had a bit of a tumultuous start to her relationship with her future husband, what with her turning up pregnant and the ensuing idea that he might have her stoned and all. She's come through that with what turned out to be an honorable man, left her family of origin and traveled a long road to a town far away, had a baby in a stable and has just been visited by some rather excited shepherds who were also visited by an angel. Whoa. I'd be flipping out a little. I mean, can you imagine a group of strange men showing up shortly after you gave birth? Just having a regular baby in the traditional manner, and not surrounded by livestock, threw me in to a bit of a tailspin. It's hard. But Mary, she not only treasures these things, but ponders them in her heart.
I think maybe it's an art we've lost, this heart pondering. Our world moves so fast. When was the last time you took the time to ponder something in your heart? To really take it in, mull it over and commit to the memory of your heart? We've all heard it, that the days are long but the years are short. In the blink of an eye, that baby that threw you in to a tailspin is crossing the street by herself, thinking about colleges and boys.
Sometimes we wish those long days away. I'm guilty of it. Some days bedtime can't come soon enough (like before breakfast would be great). Some days I dream of sandy, quiet beaches and a good book. Or a hot cup of tea that didn't have to be reheated. Or just the space to go to the bathroom by myself!
So here we are, smack dab in the middle of December. Shopping, wrapping, baking, concerts, parties, deadlines, decorating, volunteering. There is so much to do at this time of year and we want to enjoy it all. We want to bake cookies with our kids and be at their class parties (OK, well, kind of). We want to decorate and give and help others. We love the spirit of Christmastime, but December. It all moves so fast. Sometimes it seems there's no time to stop and enjoy this beautiful time of year.
God is not bound by time. He knew what our Christmas time would look like. All those years ago, as Mary labored on hay and dirt and stone, He knew. And I love that He gave us this little verse, Beloved. These dozen words that bring me back to right now. When life is flying by at the speed of light and the burden is almost unbearable, treasure it up. Store it away and ponder it in your heart.
I know we're sick of it. "The days are long but the years are short." "Before you know it, they'll be in college." "It seems like just yesterday that mine were that little," and then she walks away and goes to lunch with her husband at a place that doesn't hand out plastic wrapped sporks. I'm right there with you, eating off my spork. And it's hard to treasure sporks and a constant bathroom companion. And I don't think we have to. For every spork, for every time I wheel a screaming child strapped into a cart around a store, there are tiny arms wrapped around my neck, a little voice that tells me I'm pretty before I ever do my hair, a middle schooler who puts his head on my shoulder, a teenager who wants to talk. Find the moments in your day that you can treasure, Mama, no matter what stage you're in and tomorrow when you're looking for that missing shoe, again, ponder that treasure.
But maybe there's even more than that. More than writing down the cute things they say, more than the firsts and the lasts, more than overlooking the hardness to see the good stuff in our mama lives. Jesus was Mary's son and I'm sure there were a hundred adorable things He did as a child. I'm certain that the first time He smiled and cooed at His mama, that her heart was overwhelmed with joy as she looked into His little eyes. But there was so much more. As Mary looked back, she not only relished the memories of her sweet baby boy, she saw the faithfulness of God unfolded before her. She saw miracles. She saw love. She saw patient providence. She saw hope. She saw love. These are the things that she treasured up in her heart. These are the things, that over the years, as her child was missing for several days in a big, unfamiliar city, as her closest friends questioned Him, as He was mocked, tried and even put to death, that she pondered in her heart. Through all of the trials she walked through, she knew that God was faithful, from the beginning of time, throughout a pregnancy despised and questioned by her society, even as she gave birth among livestock, she had seen God was at work. She knew that He had a plan bigger than her, that would offer hope to so many.
What are you treasuring up in your heart? When life turns upside down and you feel burdens beyond what you think you can bear, what will your heart ponder?
